So.. I was really looking forward to this trip. The trip to Dharamshala. I was thinking of all the fun I was gonna have as I looked out the window of the train I was sitting in. I was all so excited.
Two hours into the journey from Jodhpur, the train stopped at a station called Merta Road. A normal stop for like 10 minutes. As I sat there looking at all sorts of people on the railway station, I got a call from a friend of mine who was supposed to go with me for the trip. Horrible call cuz she told me the weather in Dharamshala was absolutely horrible n that there were insane rains. So in a nutshell, the trip I had been looking forward to for more than a month just got canceled. Damn the weather god!! (if she’s hot I take it back)
But then I realized, y travel to Delhi n then Dharamshala when there is NO trip? So I asked around n found out that there was a train to Jodhpur that was supposed to arrive within 3-4 minutes. Dat was it, the entire 95 kgs of me, got off the train n started running at a blazing fast speed (yes, I can run quite fast, stop laughing u morons) towards the ticket counter of a station in the middle of nowhere.
1st obstacle: The attendant at the exit a second after which lied the ticket counter, wouldn’t let me pass without a ticket of my journey till there. I had kept the ticket in my backpack alongwith all my mess, so I kept my luggage down (backpack n a hand bag) n scanned my backpack till i got the ticket. Ok cool, showed it n he let me through.
2nd Obstacle: I asked the dude at the ticket counter to give me a ticket 2 jodhpur by the train that was to arrive in 2-3 minutes. Dat ancient relic started yelling at me. He wanted the name of the train. I was like W.T.F.F.F.F????? He yelled at me to go to d inquiry n find out. I started running around like a chicken in a poultry farm to find the goddamn inquiry. Finally I found it.
3rd. obstacle: There was no one at the inquiry except a really old n battered chair.
4th obstacle: By this time the train had arrived, I saw it arrive and it had nicely parked itself on the tracks parallel to where my train was standing. So i had to CROSS OVER the platform to get on it! I Was like ok, the train will wait for some time atleast.
5th obstacle: Fuckin que @ the ticket counter. Now der was a que!? In THIS station??? Come onn!!!
6th obstacle: I got to the ticket counter n asked the ancient mammal to give me the ticket to the train that was standing there. He gives me the ticket n tells me “Hurry Up! U might miss the train”. Asshole. N true to his word, the train had started moving!!!!
THE best obstacle(s): I had no time to climb the bridge to get to the other side n catch the train. It was too late for that. So I ran to my delhi bound train n thought of jumping trains! I entered n the door to the other side was jammed!! I turned around to get to the other coach cuz the door was closer, guess What?? The connector to the other coach was sealed!! Wow.. this couldn’t get any better. Oh but Wait! It does get better! The train I was IN started moving!! Towards the opposite direction!!!
A night in Merta Road? What if this place only serves VEGETARIAN food!!!
That was it, no time to lose, I bulldozed through the coach knocking down many a man, woman, child and cockroach to get to the other end hoping that the door was open. N it was!! Now if only I could jump from one moving train to another, the other train, obviously, by now had gained a considerable amount of speed.
I scanned d environment n noticed the steel water pipe in between my train n d other.I jump on it without thinking. N now, I was standing inbetween two moving trains, with luggage in one hand n a steel PIPE deciding my fate. Not a very gud feeling really, more like shit my pants kind of a feeling.
Now I had to catch the other train. Wid my heavy hand bag full of winter clothes, I look for an open door n there it was!! I grabbed the railing, put my foot on the steel stairs n got flung into the train.. yea.. wid my luggage im guessing my hand just withstood 100kgs.
So as I stood there, sweating n panting like a hippo who that chased by a lion, I realized something. All my limbs were in place n since they were, weirdly, this whole experience… was.. well.. fun!
I was Indiana Jones for like a minute or two ;P
Friday, August 20, 2010
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Mightalius
His heavy and sluggish steps trembled the very core of the underworld. Their nemesis had arrived. It was time. The demon guards at the gate did not hesitate to flee for the gates were about to feel the wrath of the gauntlet of Zorohan.
Hell resounded with a deafening noise as one of the thousand feet high golden gates to hell, each forged in the mountains of a thousand crystals and bound by the most ancient of dark magic, were smashed wide open by the gauntlet with no resistance. The demon army ran wild before his sheer power. With every defense broken, his entire army wiped clean, Lucifer had no choice but to face him.
Mightalius spoke: “ Lucifer! FACE your FATE!” and with tremendous power he swung his diamond Ethlisian hammer and crushed the floor below him, shaking the very foundation of hell, challenging the prince of darkness to the final duel.
Lucifer’s anger knew no bounds, hell burned with fury.
“He dare comes to my home and challenge me?”; Lucifer fumed. But something was amiss, he felt a weird sensation in the pit of his stomach, something he felt ages ago, he did not know what it was, for he had forgotten to feel. It bothered him.
Mightalius smashed open the final gate.
The mighty Knight stood before Lucifer with all his might, a blinding aura around his head, his brilliant hair and beard sprawled in all its white silky splendor, his armor glistening with the mightiest of powers that it was blessed with.
The sight of Mightalius reminded Lucifer of himself. Strong, arms ready for attack, fearless and enraged to the brim.
As he stood in front of the mighty knight of the gods, he realised that it was his end that stood right before his eyes. Lucifer now knew what was bothering him. A feeling he felt thousands of years ago while falling from heaven.
He was afraid.
Hell resounded with a deafening noise as one of the thousand feet high golden gates to hell, each forged in the mountains of a thousand crystals and bound by the most ancient of dark magic, were smashed wide open by the gauntlet with no resistance. The demon army ran wild before his sheer power. With every defense broken, his entire army wiped clean, Lucifer had no choice but to face him.
Mightalius spoke: “ Lucifer! FACE your FATE!” and with tremendous power he swung his diamond Ethlisian hammer and crushed the floor below him, shaking the very foundation of hell, challenging the prince of darkness to the final duel.
Lucifer’s anger knew no bounds, hell burned with fury.
“He dare comes to my home and challenge me?”; Lucifer fumed. But something was amiss, he felt a weird sensation in the pit of his stomach, something he felt ages ago, he did not know what it was, for he had forgotten to feel. It bothered him.
Mightalius smashed open the final gate.
The mighty Knight stood before Lucifer with all his might, a blinding aura around his head, his brilliant hair and beard sprawled in all its white silky splendor, his armor glistening with the mightiest of powers that it was blessed with.
The sight of Mightalius reminded Lucifer of himself. Strong, arms ready for attack, fearless and enraged to the brim.
As he stood in front of the mighty knight of the gods, he realised that it was his end that stood right before his eyes. Lucifer now knew what was bothering him. A feeling he felt thousands of years ago while falling from heaven.
He was afraid.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Rage
A rats ass, I do not give,
To what u say or what u believe,
This life is mine, let me live it, god dammit get offa me!,
Ur shit ideas n plans and fucking beliefs,
Can go up ur ass if u think u can plant them in me,
Fuck the world but give a fuck bout the ones u care,
Every1 else can go die somewhere, I don’t care!!,
That’s my motto, fuck off, I don’t care bout ur fucking stare,
So shut ur hole n mind ur own fucking business,
Don’t fuckin talk to me, just shut up n be a princess.
To what u say or what u believe,
This life is mine, let me live it, god dammit get offa me!,
Ur shit ideas n plans and fucking beliefs,
Can go up ur ass if u think u can plant them in me,
Fuck the world but give a fuck bout the ones u care,
Every1 else can go die somewhere, I don’t care!!,
That’s my motto, fuck off, I don’t care bout ur fucking stare,
So shut ur hole n mind ur own fucking business,
Don’t fuckin talk to me, just shut up n be a princess.
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Cold fire
Wow, it's been quite some time since i wrote my last blog. Oh well, I only write down incidents of my life that I think r worthy of this page... u know.. stuff like "I drank water today".. or "I switched on the fan".. stuff like that.. u know, really important stuff.
Well anyway, for almost a week now I have been suffering from a problem which is bothering me quite a bit since it makes me regret doing what I love to do; eat. A weird problem I tell you, whenever I eat or drink anything that is tasty, i can feel it traveling down my esophagus and into my stomach. But then that's not the weird part, the weird part is where the entire pathway starts burning from the moment i gulp in the food n wait for it, that's not the best part. The burning sensation.. is cool. Not like "yo dude dats cool!", i mean "going by the cool body temperature, we can say that he has been dead for 3 hours" cool. More like cold fire. I can feel the burning going down my throat and then exploding into my stomach. yeah, it's more like an inverted nuclear bomb. Well, I think that god is laughing his ass off at my misery. Dat ass of a man. Oh he isn't jes laughing at me, he's laughing at all of u! ever wondered why anything that tastes bad is good for ur health n anything that taste good is not? That's god laughing at u.
Well anyway, I got myself checked up at the "medical center" where the guy gave me a medicine n thankfully it didn't have "FOR INDUSTRIAL USE ONLY" unlike the last time I went there. Quite surprisingly i feel a bit better now.. it's more like a grenade now rather than a nuclear explosion n so hopefully in a few days it will turn into a diwali cracker. So that's about it for 2day, hopefully I won't explode n will live 2 write another blog another day! yeah. i know. it's lame. that's the point. ass.
Well anyway, for almost a week now I have been suffering from a problem which is bothering me quite a bit since it makes me regret doing what I love to do; eat. A weird problem I tell you, whenever I eat or drink anything that is tasty, i can feel it traveling down my esophagus and into my stomach. But then that's not the weird part, the weird part is where the entire pathway starts burning from the moment i gulp in the food n wait for it, that's not the best part. The burning sensation.. is cool. Not like "yo dude dats cool!", i mean "going by the cool body temperature, we can say that he has been dead for 3 hours" cool. More like cold fire. I can feel the burning going down my throat and then exploding into my stomach. yeah, it's more like an inverted nuclear bomb. Well, I think that god is laughing his ass off at my misery. Dat ass of a man. Oh he isn't jes laughing at me, he's laughing at all of u! ever wondered why anything that tastes bad is good for ur health n anything that taste good is not? That's god laughing at u.
Well anyway, I got myself checked up at the "medical center" where the guy gave me a medicine n thankfully it didn't have "FOR INDUSTRIAL USE ONLY" unlike the last time I went there. Quite surprisingly i feel a bit better now.. it's more like a grenade now rather than a nuclear explosion n so hopefully in a few days it will turn into a diwali cracker. So that's about it for 2day, hopefully I won't explode n will live 2 write another blog another day! yeah. i know. it's lame. that's the point. ass.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
1 of my 1st assignments in college!
THE STATE BUS!
Quick like the lightning, fast like the thunder,
Blowing everyone off the road, causing nothing but blunder.
Bigger than the elephant, strong as Kumbhkaran was,
What am I talking about? What else but the state bus!
One horn and the pedestrians panic,
As if they are about to have cough tonic.
What to do now? Where to be?
Want to be safe? Run up a tree!
No maintenance, that’s their moral,
What if the bus starts breaking midway? It’s normal!
Driving is just like a joyride for them,
Accidents? Is there any difference between speed breakers and men?
Driving as if drunk, yet sober,
By the time all the stops are done, many lives are over.
Running over animals, people, houses, walls and sometimes maybe a bank,
Hey!, isn’t it much similar to a military tank?
Pity the person, who raised his hand to stop a state bus,
For now there’s nothing in the place where a hand once was.
The door flinging open at every brake, cracking open many a bikers head,
They are just practicing to make breakfast, the door a spoon and the bikers head the egg!
Boarding a state bus during office hours is very irritating,
‘cause at that time you can hear your ribs slowly cracking.
Punching, strangling, yelling, screaming, stabbing and more!
Peace, friendship, respect, love what for?
No indication as to what is its route, where it’ll go, where it’ll end up?
Get up and sit, do not ask else be thrown out.
So if you are wondering as to what is the quickest way to heaven (or hell, which ever your choice was),
The answer is- What else but the state bus!
Quick like the lightning, fast like the thunder,
Blowing everyone off the road, causing nothing but blunder.
Bigger than the elephant, strong as Kumbhkaran was,
What am I talking about? What else but the state bus!
One horn and the pedestrians panic,
As if they are about to have cough tonic.
What to do now? Where to be?
Want to be safe? Run up a tree!
No maintenance, that’s their moral,
What if the bus starts breaking midway? It’s normal!
Driving is just like a joyride for them,
Accidents? Is there any difference between speed breakers and men?
Driving as if drunk, yet sober,
By the time all the stops are done, many lives are over.
Running over animals, people, houses, walls and sometimes maybe a bank,
Hey!, isn’t it much similar to a military tank?
Pity the person, who raised his hand to stop a state bus,
For now there’s nothing in the place where a hand once was.
The door flinging open at every brake, cracking open many a bikers head,
They are just practicing to make breakfast, the door a spoon and the bikers head the egg!
Boarding a state bus during office hours is very irritating,
‘cause at that time you can hear your ribs slowly cracking.
Punching, strangling, yelling, screaming, stabbing and more!
Peace, friendship, respect, love what for?
No indication as to what is its route, where it’ll go, where it’ll end up?
Get up and sit, do not ask else be thrown out.
So if you are wondering as to what is the quickest way to heaven (or hell, which ever your choice was),
The answer is- What else but the state bus!
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Neck-less
It's a beautiful Sunday, I slept early yesterday to enjoy my day off, I think before sleeping; "well.. this is nice.. this is comfy, my room is cool and my playlist is playing soft music, I am going to enjoy my sleep.. sigh" and so the beautiful hand of sleep caressed my head and the next morning I wake up with a big "EEEEOOOWWWWWWWW!!!!"
It was like someone has literally wacked the side of my neck with a shovel and then poured wet cement on it which had dried! Juh-he-zus!! Never in the entirety of my life have I experienced such excruciating pain in my neck. All the sleep jes vaporized into thin air and with every exhale I yelped an "ow ow ow". I dunno wot happened, but i woke up feeling like I never should have! I just couldn't turn my head left! I had to move my entire body to the left to look in that direction. Ofcourse, my friends had the time of their life with this one with the often threat to twist my head like a screw.. to the left! The point is, it's been 16 hours since the pain started and it shows no signs of healing in any way, the excruciating pain still insists that it remains. Till now I have applied volini and a weird expensive oil on the affected region, but all they seem to affect are my eyes. A friend of mine suggested that sleeping would cure it and so now i will go to sleep hoping and praying that tomorrow morning I wake up with a sigh of relief instead of a scream that will lead the pigeon living outside my balcony to drop dead. With this I bid adieu to my blog. Adios amigos. Ow.
It was like someone has literally wacked the side of my neck with a shovel and then poured wet cement on it which had dried! Juh-he-zus!! Never in the entirety of my life have I experienced such excruciating pain in my neck. All the sleep jes vaporized into thin air and with every exhale I yelped an "ow ow ow". I dunno wot happened, but i woke up feeling like I never should have! I just couldn't turn my head left! I had to move my entire body to the left to look in that direction. Ofcourse, my friends had the time of their life with this one with the often threat to twist my head like a screw.. to the left! The point is, it's been 16 hours since the pain started and it shows no signs of healing in any way, the excruciating pain still insists that it remains. Till now I have applied volini and a weird expensive oil on the affected region, but all they seem to affect are my eyes. A friend of mine suggested that sleeping would cure it and so now i will go to sleep hoping and praying that tomorrow morning I wake up with a sigh of relief instead of a scream that will lead the pigeon living outside my balcony to drop dead. With this I bid adieu to my blog. Adios amigos. Ow.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Goa dearest
So, I went to Goa a couple of weeks back, amazing place n what i mean by amazing is food, beer and tons of hot women in almost no clothes (this excludes the old aunties in bikinis who thought that no1 was watching them, well, aunties, ppl did n they did not like what they saw.. GOD did not like what he saw, the waves ran away from what they saw n thankfully, my specs jumped in2 the ocean with what it saw) Indeed, I was in Goa without specs for 3 whole days, so my best memories of Goa are the taste of the food and beer and the outlines of women whom my friends called hot. Dunno if they were making fun of me, cuz they could've easily been pointing at a fruit vendor or a guy in an ultra small swim suit describing them 2 me as hot chicks. I dunno, but I'd like to think that they didn't. Apart from the fact that I was blind Goa, it was fun! (I kudn't get lenses or specs made cuz of complicated reasons which could have been easily typed out in this very space within a few words but I'd rather waste ur time.)
Did some water sports which led me to drinking at least a gallon of sea water and with para sailing, my ass was in mid air for not more than a minute. So yeah, it was fun. The amazing beach, the friendly people, the amazing sea food, the cheapest booze n the hottest of women.. aaah, hopefully heaven's gonna be like this. (Dear god, if not a beach atleast have some hot women.. in the strib club).
However, I didn't drink much, for some reason I didn't wanna drink, just eat! N so I ate, like a whale. so all in all, a good trip with blurred memories that will last forever!
Did some water sports which led me to drinking at least a gallon of sea water and with para sailing, my ass was in mid air for not more than a minute. So yeah, it was fun. The amazing beach, the friendly people, the amazing sea food, the cheapest booze n the hottest of women.. aaah, hopefully heaven's gonna be like this. (Dear god, if not a beach atleast have some hot women.. in the strib club).
However, I didn't drink much, for some reason I didn't wanna drink, just eat! N so I ate, like a whale. so all in all, a good trip with blurred memories that will last forever!
Checking Chacking Testing Tasting Testes
Checking, cheykeeng, taste taste taste, uaan too theeree phor! helu? helu?? well, it seems that my blog is up and friggin running! I see this as the start to a long n beautiful relationship.. damn.. y does that not sound nice? oh yeah, i know! cuz im tokin bout a friggin blog site thats y! well, I'll 4get that I actually typed out the previous line n get on with it. This is my 1st blog.. kinda.. so I jes wanned 2 c how it looks like!! This is so exciting I can go off to sleep with my face on my keypad! considering the fact that my face is already on the keypad n im typing with my nose cuz i dont feel like using my hands, I'll jes post this little nonsensical blog n go 2 sleep, so that I can come up with actual blogs from 2moro onwards! n hopefully, it's gonna b fun!! yahoo!...?
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